The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
