Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize