My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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