The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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