He told me they were just razor bumps!
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
