My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
