With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
