so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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