Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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