i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
