having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
