Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
