oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Randomize
