I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Randomize
