I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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