Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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