hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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