hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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