i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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