if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
