Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize