ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
