: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I wish i was in the wii world.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
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