You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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