i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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