I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
