i think my tv is drunk
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize