Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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