I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
