my sisters under your porch take her home
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
