exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
