i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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