What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
