maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
