last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Randomize
