windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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