I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Randomize