Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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