I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Randomize
