WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Randomize
