i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
