just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
What drink are we having for lunch?
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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