so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
