he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
