I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
