I want to have your abortion
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
