She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
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