You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
