If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
