If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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