I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
it's like iHOP with fire
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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