he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
