Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
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